BONKER 9000 Mjolnir for homeless people.

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An extraordinary melee weapon.
Used by Johnny Caste, Created by HeihachiGaming.
On Legendary Artifact Lead Pipe.

A lead pipe, glows red when swung, glows blue when hitting a weapon.

This Lead Pipe was forged by an unknown hobo king. It is rumored his forge was just a bunch of rats encased in amber imbuing anything forged with extreme power when held in the hands of a homeless person. It melts through armor like butter with it's sheer speed, and breaks through weapons like if they were brittle metals with its hardened metal. It's like mjolnir for homeless people.


This Artifact can be used as a club / improvised weapon. It is roughly the same size as a club / improvised weapon and just as difficult to conceal.

Attack by rolling Brawn + Melee, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +4 Weapon Damage. The target's fully effective

You also gain the following effects:

  • Blade Breaker: If you successfully Defend against a melee attack or if an opponent is unsuccessful at Defending against your melee attack, you may break your opponent's weapon.
  • Shredder: If you successfully hit your target, the value of any Armor they are wearing is reduced by 2. This penalty lasts until the armor is repaired.

  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.

Community Functional Gifts

This Artifact has been upgraded.

This Artifact receives 2 extra dice to all actions taken for its intended use. Attacking with an upgraded weapon grants +2 Weapon Damage instead of additional dice. While it is upgraded, the item cannot be destroyed.

Upgraded weapons count as any material your opponent might be particularly vulnerable to. Upgraded Armor cannot be circumvented by called shots. Upgraded Devices do not run out of fuel or energy.

  • "Destroyed" in this context means "prevented from functioning for its primary purpose", so for instance, an upgraded land mine would still explode as normal if triggered, even though it cannot be "destroyed" and a car's windows may still be broken.
  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used. The same is true for extra dice.
  • Extra dice from this Effect do not apply to Gift activation rolls.

This Artifact can be used as a Big Bessie (Modded Foundation Anomaly Transport APC). It is roughly the same size as a Big Bessie (Modded Foundation Anomaly Transport APC) but can be collapsed into A decactivated.50 BMG bullet on a chain and concealed. Collapsing or expanding it costs a Quick Action.

This Big Bessie (Modded Foundation Anomaly Transport APC) has Armored vehicle, nitrous installed, back compartment is separate and air tight with an 8 hour oxygen supply. All other foundation compliant features, including built in police scanner, and radio communication.. Any roll to pilot this vehicle receives +2 dice.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Amphibious: Your vehicle may move on land as well as under water at its normal speed. If your vehicle includes an enclosed space, it will function as an airtight, pressurized cockpit.
  • Flying Car: Your vehicle may also fly at its normal speed. Taking off takes a full Action.

  • If there is not enough free space to expand the object, it cannot be expanded. You cannot expand this Object as an attack.

This Artifact can be used as a container. It is roughly the same size as a Large Metal Banded Wooden Chest but can be collapsed into A Wallet and concealed. Collapsing or expanding it costs a Quick Action.

Your Large Metal Banded Wooden Chest has a normal storage capacity, but can be collapsed down to a pocket-sized version without losing any internal storage. You cannot access the contents while it is collapsed. Objects stored inside weigh their normal amount.

Living things can be stored in your Large Metal Banded Wooden Chest. They will have access to anything else inside and may attempt to break free, damaging or destroying the Large Metal Banded Wooden Chest in the process.

If your Large Metal Banded Wooden Chest is destroyed, things inside may get out, and it will cease to function until it is repaired.

This item is a living thing. It counts as a Creature when targeted. If destroyed or abandoned for more than two days, it dies and becomes unusable.

  • There is no cost to use your container.

This Artifact can be used as a javelin. It is roughly at least twice as large as a javelin and cannot be concealed on your person or disassembled for storage.

Attack by rolling Brawn + Athletics, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +4 Weapon Damage. The target's Armor is fully effective against this damage. Attacks

You also gain the following effects:

  • Chain Lightning: You may Exert your Mind to perform a chain lightning attack. If your attack succeeds, All targets within 5 feet of your primary target take full Damage. The Damage can “jump” up to 5 times. Each target can be hit only once.
  • Heavy Toss: If your attack hits a target, it either knocks them down, or knocks them back 5 feet times the attack's Outcome. Decide which before you roll.
  • Pin: If your attack inflicts an Injury on your target, you may "pin" to the ground or a nearby wall. They are stuck there until you remove the weapon. The target may spend a Quick Action and increase the Injury's Severity by 1 to pull themselves free.
  • Return: When you throw this weapon, you may opt to have it return to your possession at the end of the attack. Whoever threw this artifact last may use an Action to recall it from up to 100 feet away, attacking one target in its return path as they do so.

  • This Artifact cannot be disguised or morphed with other Effects like Shape-Changing object.
  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.

This Artifact can be used as a handgun. It is roughly the same size as a handgun but can be collapsed into a rabbit's foot and concealed. Collapsing or expanding it costs a Quick Action.

Attack by rolling Dexterity + Firearms, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +4 Weapon Damage.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Infinite Ammo: This weapon never runs out of its standard ammunition.
  • You may spend a Quick Action to change this firearm's base stats into those of any other basic firearm.
  • Silencer: The report of any shots you fire may be made silent at will.

  • If there is not enough free space to expand the object, it cannot be expanded. You cannot expand this Object as an attack.
  • Changing this weapon's base type affects its range, Weapon Damage, concealability, and roll. Other mechanics of the chosen base firearm (such as the tripod requirement for sniper rifles) apply.
  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.
  • Rifles are +1 Difficulty to use in melee range. Sniper Rifles are +3 Difficulty to use without a tripod or in melee range. Setting up a tripod takes an Action.

Stock Functional Gifts

This Artifact can be used as a blimp. It is roughly the same size as a blimp but can be collapsed into a phone-sized canvas cube and concealed. Collapsing or expanding it costs a Quick Action.

This blimp has full science laboratory, bullet-proof envelope, and ample parachutes. Any roll to pilot this vehicle receives +2 dice.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Crew of One: You alone may stand in for an entire crew if the vehicle would normally be piloted by more than one.
  • Mind of its Own: This vehicle can move and take Actions without you driving it. It has seven dice for all Drive rolls.
  • No Muffler: Any stealth rolls made to hide your vehicle automatically fail, and any rolls made to notice your vehicle automatically succeed.

  • If there is not enough free space to expand the object, it cannot be expanded. You cannot expand this Object as an attack.

This Artifact can be used as a container. It is roughly the same size as a alligator-skin briefcase and just as difficult to conceal. Unless you are storing something commonly found in coffins, this Artifact behaves as its mundane counterpart.

Your alligator-skin briefcase holds 5 times what it normally could. Objects stored inside are weightless.

Living things can be stored in your alligator-skin briefcase. They will have access to anything else inside and may attempt to break free, damaging or destroying the alligator-skin briefcase in the process.

If your alligator-skin briefcase is destroyed, things inside may get out, and it will cease to function until it is repaired.

You may change the type of your container between Contracts.

Only you may open and close the container. Others can still destroy it to get at the contents

  • You cannot change the container's type if you are not in possession of it.
  • There is no cost to use your container.

This Artifact can change its appearance. When not transformed, it is roughly the same size as a passport and just as difficult to conceal.

Exert your Mind and spend an Action to activate. This Artifact changes its appearance into an Object within the category of forms of identification. This lasts until you decide to end the Effect, which may be done as a Free Action.

The new object's appearance can mimic specific items (such as a particular painting, a certain person’s ID, etc), but must be of a similar size and weight to this Artifact.

The new appearance is illusory; it will hold up to scrutiny, but its composition is not altered and it gains no new functionality. Any attempt to use it for a function which it cannot perform (for instance, making bread look like a knife and then trying to stab someone) will cause the illusion to fail or allow a Perception check to see through the illusion, at the GM's discretion.

This Artifact can be used as a rifle. It is roughly the same size as a rifle but can be collapsed into a metallic disk and concealed. Collapsing or expanding it costs a Quick Action.

Attack by rolling Dexterity + Firearms, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +4 Weapon Damage. The target's Armor is fully effective against this Damage.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Silencer: Shots you fire can be made silent at will.

  • If there is not enough free space to expand the object, it cannot be expanded. You cannot expand this Object as an attack.
  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.
  • Rifles are +1 Difficulty to use in melee range. Sniper Rifles are +3 Difficulty to use without a tripod or in melee range. Setting up a tripod takes an Action.

This Artifact can be used as a bow. It is roughly at least twice as large as a bow and cannot be concealed on your person or disassembled for storage.

Attack by rolling Dexterity + Athletics, Difficulty 6. Successful attacks deal Contested Outcome +4 Weapon Damage. The target's Armor is fully effective against this Damage. Attacks do not require a successful called shot to do damage.

You also gain the following effects:

  • Infinite Ammo: This weapon never runs out of its standard ammunition.
  • Leave No Trace: Your projectiles crumble or vanish after impact, leaving no meaningful trace of your assault beyond the wounds they leave. If your attack would kill or incapacitate your target, they make no sound, even incidentally, for the next Round.

  • This Artifact cannot be disguised or morphed with other Effects like Shape-Changing object.
  • Reminder: additional Weapon Damage granted by this Effect does not stack with any other bonus to Weapon Damage. Instead the largest bonus is used.