The gift appears to be a large backpack. One can put any object inside and loudly declares, while holding the backpack, "If only I had [food item]". Be sure that there are no other items in the backpack, because they will be consumed.
(Note that one cannot request a whole dish; for example, they can order plain macaroni, but not mac and cheese).
Open the backpack after five minutes to reveal the requested food item, whose output weight matches that of the input. The taste of the food will depend on the value of the object. Make sure it's exactly 5 minutes. Who knows what'll happen if it isn't.
Black goo will always seep out from the bottom of the backpack when in use.
On the backpack:
It's easy enough to mistake for any backpack at all, and Delphyrion has not put a label on it. They have lost quite a few beakers and pens to it whenever they mused about their next experiment, as they often reach epiphanies by saying, "If only I had [food item]". Perhaps that's why the artifact works this way.
On food quality:
For some reason the output quality directly ties to the price of food in Orlando. So, put a 5-cent pencil in the backpack, and you'll get a 5-cent quality potato fry.
Also, yeah, make sure it's 5 minutes exactly. This is a theoretical number; no one has tried to test its limits, hence its reference to Schrodinger.
(On a critical fail, one fails to retrieve the food in time and it is either underdeveloped or spoiled.)
On the black goo:
Delphyrion themself isn't sure what it is, nor do they ever remember to analyze it. It doesn't seem to leave any residue on the backpack itself, though it stains quite horribly on porous material including skin. With enough washes it should go away.
If consumed, call the Poison Control Center and pray.
(Also pray that you are not Dephyrion, the chemist who has had 0 interaction with any religion at all, and therefore still thinks priests can get pregnant.)
On Madness:
One gets uncontrollably angry at the sight or mention of any food that did not come out of the backpack. It feels as if one is running a state-of-the-art restaurant, yet people line up for the nearby McDonald's instead. Delphyrion feels this way towards content farms like 1-minute arts.
Expend a point of Battery and spend a minute. Select a non-Alien Device within arm's reach. Roll a single D10 as a critical failure check. If you roll a 1, the Effect fails, and you think the backpack has created the intended food item. In fact, it appears and smells more delightful than it should, to the point that you are urged to eat it right away no matter what. You will develop Vertigo upon eating the food as it turns out to be incredibly poisonous. Cannot be used to improve Armor.
Lasts the next two hours. Your target receives 2 extra dice to all actions taken for its intended use. Attacking with an upgraded weapon grants +2 Weapon Damage instead of additional dice.
Anyone who touches this Artifact will notice it warping their mind and may drop it. If they choose to hold or use it, they immediately receive the following Trauma: You must roll Self-Control to contain the urge to cannibalize yourself or the person who brought up the food. If they lose possession of this Artifact, the Trauma heals over the course of the next day.
Here bro, take a fat rip and feel the universe bro... It's heal you fur sure
Spend 15 minutes and use up this fat bl*nt (unless you succeed on 1d10, Difficulty 7). Select a Living target within arm's reach. Your target must also Exert their Mind to activate this Effect. Roll 7 dice at Difficulty 6, dice penalties do not apply.
If you succeed, the Injury is reduced in Severity by your Outcome. If you reduce its Severity to 0, the Injury is fully healed. Otherwise, it is partially healed and will heal the rest of the way at its natural rate.
This counts as a successful Makeshift Stabilization if the Injury was not already Stabilized; any Battle Scars caused by the Injury will remain.
Dr, Rockman, points and waves his stick at a target and they are covered in white divine fire. The fire burns through objects and monsters of evil but leaves innocents unharmed as the fire is cool to them. The fire is fueled by the sins of the target as it burns them and their crimes away.
Evil; Your target is a Sapient and missing the Murder or Atrocities limits, or a monster that kills humans
Exert your Mind (only for extinguishing a fire, no cost for starting one) and spend an Action. Select a target within 20 feet which has both fuel and oxygen available (if you are starting a new fire). This Effect cannot be used unless the target is Evil and in angelic form.
You may start or extinguish a fire as large as a firepit's fire at your target. Your fires require fuel and oxygen in order to continue burning.
Lighting a target on fire deals 4 Damage each Round on your turn, starting in the Round after the one in which they caught fire. This Damage is reduced by Armor, but the target’s Armor rating will be shredded by any Damage dealt, destroying material Armor once it reaches 0.
You may extinguish flames as a Reaction. This does not extend to explosives.
red energy gathers around the eye of Alpha, before firing off a red beam of energy, containing a small swarm of nano bots towards the target, which slowly eat at the body of whatever they hit
Spend an Action. Select a target within 45 feet. Roll Brawn + Athletics Difficulty 6. The target may contest by rolling to Dodge or Defend as a Reaction, Difficulty 6.
If the Contested Outcome is positive, the target takes that much Damage plus 2.
The target suffers a -3 dice penalty for the next hour or until the Injury is healed. This dice penalty does not stack multiple times on the same target.
This Gift's Cost is capped at 2 and cannot be increased further.
Instead of dealing Damage all at once, the Injury caused by this Power starts at Severity 1 and worsens at the rate of one level per Round until it reaches the Severity it would have otherwise been.
Pulling on the memories of destruction, breaking, and bringing down structures he focuses on that and summons the power of the wind to inflict this pain on whom ever, or what ever, he choose
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Gathering wind around himself, he envelopes his body in a light whirlwind before shaping it into a large mallet that he wields for a brief moment. Immediately after he sweeps the new weapon toward the target, releasing a supernaturally enforced shotgun-like gust of air that slams into the victim. This causes the hammer to vanish once it impacts something but in return, the target is hit with the sensation of hundreds of razor blades cutting and slashing at their body.
Spend an Action. Select a target within 45 feet. Roll Dexterity + Crafts Difficulty 6. The target may contest by rolling to Dodge or Defend as a Reaction, Difficulty 6.
If the Contested Outcome is positive, the target takes that much Damage plus 4.
This Gift's Cost is capped at 2 and cannot be increased further.
...
Spend two Actions performing the following ritual: a growling, loud howl. Select a number of Living targets equal to your Charisma within 45 feet. You must maintain Concentration while activating this Effect, and it fails if you are interrupted. Roll Charisma + Influence at Difficulty 6. Affected targets can resist by rolling Mind at Difficulty 6.
If you succeed, for the next hour, affected targets will do things they otherwise wouldn’t have done, inspired by cowering fear. They will not necessarily display their emotions in an obvious way.
Actions they take will be in keeping with their character and the way they tend to deal with strong emotions. They will be unlikely to change their mind about any actions taken or decisions made until after the Effect ends.
While this Effect is active, you are at -2 dice to all Actions and cannot Concentrate.
This Gift's Cost is capped at 2 and cannot be increased further.
The Witch is a master herbalist and can cure any number of illnesses and diseases with her special potions. She goes into the wilderness to find the proper set of herbs. Once she has what she's looking for, she mixes them together and boils the concoction. Steam rises from the mixture, twisting into recognizable shapes such as animals and spirits. The whole process takes about fifteen minutes, after which the patient must drink the entire mixture. They are immediately cured.
The proper preparation varies from person to person, so a single batch cannot be used to treat multiple people.
Exert your Mind and spend 15 minutes. Select a Living target within arm's reach. This Effect cannot be used unless you can forage for herbs. You must actively and obviously use water, a container, and heat to activate this Effect.
You may cure any Non-Alien diseases, toxins, or poisons afflicting your target even if you have not diagnosed or fully understood it. You may cure diseases or poisons even if they are not treatable through modern medicine. During treatment, the malady you are treating does not progress or cause additional Damage or other effects.
Whenever you cure a disease, poison, or toxin, if it had inflicted any Damage, your target is healed for half that Damage.
The Toon performs some sort of cartoonish act of violence. This may be handing someone a bomb, hitting someone with a cartoon mallet, burping a burp that is so noxious it melts flesh, or anything else as long as it is cartoonish.
The attack is more of a throwaway gag than a plot element, so any props or properties of the attack are incidental and disappear immediately. Animated mallets evaporate in a puff of smoke, fire does not spread, and electricity cannot power devices.
Exert your Mind and spend an Action. Select a target within 45 feet. Roll Charisma + Performance Difficulty 6. The target may contest by rolling to Dodge or Defend as a Reaction, Difficulty 6.
If the contested Outcome is positive, the target takes that much Damage plus 4. Armor is fully effective against this damage.
While transformed, the Werewolf can leap great distances, climbing structures and closing the gap to their prey.
Exert your Mind and spend an Action. Select a Location which is at most 60 feet away horizontally or 15 feet away vertically. This Effect cannot be used unless you are in werewolf form.
You jump to the chosen location. If jumping blind or landing precariously, must roll Dexterity + Athletics to land safely. You will never take fall Damage from successfully landing a jump made with this Effect.
You may opt to trade your free movement for a Super Leap if you are jumping less than 50 feet or if you are closing a gap to an opponent and spend your Action on an attack.
Perform the Five Point Technique via a series of quick pressure point hits on the target’s chest. As you do, channel your chi and speak a condition involving the number five. If the target cannot stop you from performing the technique, their heart will take a direct hit when they fulfill the chosen condition.
Exert your Mind and spend an Action. Select a Living target within arm's reach. Roll Dexterity + Brawl Difficulty 6. The target may contest by rolling Body, Difficulty 6.
If the Contested Outcome is positive, the target takes that much Damage plus 2. The target's Armor is completely ignored.
When you activate this Effect, instead of occurring immediately, you may choose to delay its effects until the target takes a particular Action. For example: "when they fire a gun" or "when they swim in deep water."
Instead of dealing Damage all at once, the Injury caused by this Power starts at Severity 1 and worsens at the rate of one level per Round until it reaches the Severity it would have otherwise been.
The aquamancer shifts into their elemental form and melds into a nearby collection of water, only to reform shortly out of a different source of water within line of sight.
Exert your Mind and spend 2 Actions. Select a Location within your line of sight , and which is directly adjacent to water. You must be within arm's reach of water to activate this Effect.
You are transported directly to the chosen Location. You must wait an hour before activating this effect again.