Schrodinger's Chef Bread out of rocks? Grapes out of gloves? I gotchu

1
A consumable backpack that lets you generate useful mundane items.
Used by Delphyrion Arcanis, Created by Cryst0lline.
( )

The consumable appears to be a large backpack. One can put any object inside and loudly declares, while holding the backpack, "If only I had [food item]". Be sure that there are no other items in the backpack, because they will be consumed.
(Note that one cannot request a whole dish; for example, they can order plain macaroni, but not mac and cheese).

Open the backpack after five minutes to reveal the requested food item, whose output weight matches that of the input. The taste of the food will depend on the value of the object. Make sure it's exactly 5 minutes. Who knows what'll happen if it isn't.

On a critical fail, black goo will come out of the backpack, but that’s probably fine because the food looks amazing, right?

On the backpack:
It's easy enough to mistake for any backpack at all, and Delphyrion has not put a label on it. They have lost quite a few beakers and pens to it whenever they mused about their next experiment, as they often reach epiphanies by saying, "If only I had [food item]". Perhaps that's why the artifact works this way.

On food quality:
For some reason the output quality directly ties to the price of food in Orlando. So, put a 5-cent pencil in the backpack, and you'll get a 5-cent quality potato fry*.
Also, yeah, make sure it's 5 minutes exactly. This is a theoretical number; no one has tried to test its limits, hence its reference to Schrodinger.
(On a critical fail, one fails to retrieve the food in time and it is either underdeveloped or spoiled.)
*Food will vanish from your stomach after 2 hours.

On the black goo:
Delphyrion themself isn't sure what it is, nor do they ever remember to analyze it. It doesn't seem to leave any residue on the backpack itself, though it stains quite horribly on porous material including skin. With enough washes it should go away.
If consumed, call the Poison Control Center and pray. Oh hey, is the room spinning?
(Also pray that you are not Dephyrion, the chemist who has had 0 interaction with any religion at all, and therefore still thinks priests can get pregnant.)

On Madness:
One gets uncontrollably angry at the sight or mention of any food that did not come out of the backpack. It feels as if one is running a state-of-the-art restaurant, yet people line up for the nearby McDonald's instead. Delphyrion feels this way towards content farms like 1-minute arts.

Use up this backpack (unless you succeed on 1d10, Difficulty 7) and spend 1 minute. Roll a single D10 as a critical failure check. If you roll a 1, the Effect fails, and you think the backpack has created the intended food item. In fact, it appears and smells more delightful than it should, to the point that you are urged to eat it right away no matter what. You will develop Vertigo upon eating the food as it turns out to be incredibly poisonous. Roll 7 dice Difficulty 6, dice penalties do not apply.

Choose a specific type of Food which could fit inside a regular backpack (up to 27 liters). It must be Non-Alien and generic. You cannot create explosives. You cannot create firearms.

Roll Intellect + Crafts to fabricate up to 5 copies of your chosen Object. The Difficulty is assigned by the GM and depends on the specificity of your chosen Object. The created item lasts 2 hours.

You may end this Effect prematurely as a Free Action.

  • This consumable is destroyed when used and cannot be used again.
  • The Difficulty for the fabrication roll increases based on specificity. Something like a "shirt" would be Difficulty 5, whereas "Police uniform" would be Difficulty 9. The Outcome determines overall quality and how well the item fits the request.
  • You can fabricate a container of something so long as it contains a single type of thing (such as a tank of water) or it is designed to be packaged together (such as a first aid kit).

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Community Activated Gifts

Exert your Mind and spend a minute to activate. This Effect cannot be used unless Near a group of at least 3 people.

You become disguised in a manner of your choosing. The disguise lasts for an hour and a half, or you may end it early at will.

The new appearance must have a similar sex, age, and race to your own. You cannot significantly change your height and weight. Your disguise cannot directly mimic an existing person. You may change the appearance of your clothes. A disguise cannot affect your Attributes or other stats.

  • While you may alter your clothing's appearance, this does not grant or store equipment.

This Effect activates whenever you take an injury. It does not require an Action or Exertion. This Effect cannot be used unless you are / were disguised at activation. Make a Trauma roll when you activate this Effect.

You transform into melted mickey for the next day. You may end the effect early and return to your normal form at will. Your structure must remain relatively contiguous. Observers will view you as an unusual entity moving with a singular purpose.

While in this form, you can squeeze through any gap that a rodent could fit through.

Damage from standard attacks is halved, but Damage from AOE effects is increased by 1. You may spend an Action to reduce one of your Injuries’ Severity by 2, as long as you obtained the Injury while transformed and the separated pieces could reasonably be rejoined. If you would die from Injuries sustained while transformed, you instead live, but the only action you can take is Reforming.

You cannot communicate or use equipment while transformed. Your equipment does not transform with you beyond basic body coverings. You cannot carry any items while transformed.

You have access to your Powers while transformed.

You may turn this Effect on and off at will during its duration.

Anyone who witnesses you during this Effect's activation or for its duration will almost certainly be disturbed to see you explode into a "melted down" mickey-mouse with many eyes, many faces, and many voices all laughing in horrifying disney unison..

After this Effect ends, you cannot move quicker than a walk (15 feet per Round) for one minute and suffer a -1 dice penalty for an hour.

You may only use this Effect once per day.

  • You may only switch this Effect on or off once per Round on your initiative as a Free Action.
  • When triggered, the Effect activation resolves immediately after the triggering Action. It is not Reaction speed.
  • When narrating disturbing content, be cognizant of your group's tone and accommodating to those who would like to "fast forward" through the description.

Exert your Mind and spend a minute. You must actively and obviously use the pelt or fur of an animal or other werecreature to activate this Effect.

You become disguised in a manner of your choosing. The disguise lasts until you either activate a new disguise, or choose to end the effect.

The new appearance must have a similar sex, age, and race to your own. You cannot significantly change your height and weight. Your disguise cannot directly mimic an existing person. You cannot alter your clothes. You may add inhuman features to your disguise. A disguise cannot affect your Attributes or other stats.

You may roll Charisma + Crafts to attempt to make your disguise Beautiful. If your Outcome is 6 or higher, non-Effect Charisma rolls where your good looks could help are rolled at -2 Difficulty. If you fail or botch, you are ugly instead, and non-Effect Charisma rolls are made at +2 Difficulty.

This Effect ends if you take an Injury or are stunned or incapacitated.

  • While you can add inhuman features, they are aesthetic only. Think star trek alien, monstergirl, demon, etc. Does not grant things such as a prehensile tail, an extra damaging brawl attack, improved senses, etc.
  • ‘Appearance’ includes voice, bone structure, skin quality, hair length and color, eye color, muscle tone, flesh texture, and generally anything perceivable about your body.

Exert your Mind and spend one minute. You must actively and obviously use lighter to activate this Effect.

You transform into a flame tornado for the next hour. You may end the effect early and return to your normal form at will. Your structure must remain relatively contiguous. Observers will view you as an unusual entity moving with a singular purpose.

While in this form, you can squeeze through any gap that is not water-tight. You may fly at your standard movement speed.

Damage from standard attacks is halved, but Damage from AOE effects is increased by 1.

You cannot communicate, use equipment, or use Gifts while transformed. Your equipment does not transform with you beyond basic body coverings. Carrying capacity is unaffected.

for my goal of pranking the world I use my own body to summon minions to help my dream

Take a Severity-1 Injury and spend an Action.

Summon a single summon gremlin pranksters at your location. They will last until they are destroyed. They are controlled by the GM but will follow any commands you give. You may have at most 2 minions active at a time.

  • Attacking: Minions can make melee range attacks with 4 dice to attack.
  • Body: Minions have 4 Body.
  • Movement: Minions can move 20 feet per Round as Free Movement, and double that when performing an all-out Sprint.
  • Intelligence: Minions have dog-level intelligence, and cannot communicate back to you. They may use equipment.
  • Actions: Minions cannot dodge or Defend. Any Perception checks they make are rolled with 3 dice. Your minion is able to pranking with a 7-dice pool.

Anyone who witnesses you during this Effect's activation or for its duration will almost certainly be disturbed to see bloody and gross.

  • When narrating disturbing content, be cognizant of your group's tone and accommodating to those who would like to "fast forward" through the description.
  • The Injury received from activating this Effect heals in 1 day and cannot be prevented or prematurely healed by any means.

Stock Activated Gifts

Exert your Mind (unless you win a coin flip) and spend 15 minutes. This Effect cannot be used unless you are in a wilderness environment.

Choose a specific type of food, water, or survival supply which could fit inside a regular backpack (up to 27 liters). It must be Non-Alien and generic. You cannot create explosives. You cannot create firearms.

Roll Perception + Survival to fabricate up to 5 copies of your chosen Object. The Difficulty is assigned by the GM and depends on the specificity of your chosen Object. Your created items no longer expire, and will last until they are destroyed.

  • You may cause a created item to expire at will as a Free Action, destroying the item.

Exert your Mind and spend an Action.

Summon a single roadie at your location. They will last for two hours, or until they are destroyed. They are controlled by the GM but will follow any commands you give. You may have at most 1 minion active at a time.

  • Attacking: Minions can make melee range attacks with 4 dice to attack.
  • Body: Minions have 6 Body.
  • Movement: Minions can move 20 feet per Round as Free Movement, and double that when performing an all-out Sprint.
  • Intelligence: Minions have dog-level intelligence, and cannot communicate back to you. They may use equipment.
  • Actions: Minions cannot dodge or Defend. Any Perception checks they make are rolled with 3 dice. Your minion is able to lift and haul equipment with a 7-dice pool.

You may only use this Effect once per day.

Exert your Mind and spend a Quick Action.

You transform into a werewolf for 3 minutes. You have access to all of your Powers while you are a werewolf, and you can use your equipment. Your Battle Scars, Injuries, and physical Liabilities are carried over between forms. Reverting from your Alternate Form cannot cause your existing Injuries to kill you. Instead, you remain Incapacitated.

While transformed, your Brawn is increased by 1 and your Dexterity is increased by 1. You do not suffer any Stress while transformed.

Your alternate form is its own deadly weapon. Unarmed attacks made in your alternate form deal +3 Weapon Damage (instead of the typical -2).

Your alternate form renders you unable to speak any human language and incapable of fine object manipulation. You can only hold or grasp objects in a crude, clumsy way.

After this Effect ends, you cannot move quicker than a walk (15 feet per Round) for one minute and suffer a -1 dice penalty for an hour.

While transformed, you automatically fail any Mind roll to resist an impulse and suffer -3 dice on all other Mind rolls.

Possession of this Power grants the following Trauma at all times: Whenever you are struck by the light of a full or gibbous moon, you must roll Self-Control to resist transforming. Triggers a max of once per night.

  • Reminder: Weapon Damage from multiple sources does not stack. Instead, the highest value is used.
  • Attribute bonuses from multiple sources do not stack. Instead the highest bonus is used.

Exert your Mind and Spend an Action.

You transform into your own corpse for one minute. While transformed, you may control the functioning of the object you have transformed into. You can perceive your surroundings as normal. You can be targeted as a Non-Living, Sapient Object.

If you are damaged while transformed, the damage is realized when you return to normal. If you are damaged before you transform, your inanimate form will appear partially damaged.

You may end this Effect prematurely as a Free Action.

  • If a character is inside of you when you revert to your original form, you take a Severity-5 Injury when they burst from your innards as you shrink.
  • You cannot move in any way the object wouldn't normally be able to move. If you are a feather duster, you cannot float around, etc.

Take a Severity-1 Injury and spend an Action. You must use up a corpse in order to activate this Effect.

Summon a single zombie at your location. They will last until they are destroyed. They are controlled by the GM but will follow any commands you give. You may have at most 1 minion active at a time.

  • Attacking: Minions can make melee range attacks with 5 dice to attack and +1 Damage.
  • Body: Minions have 6 Body.
  • Movement: Minions can move 20 feet per Round as Free Movement, and double that when performing an all-out Sprint.
  • Intelligence: Minions have dog-level intelligence, and cannot communicate back to you. They cannot actively use Equipment.
  • Actions: Minions cannot dodge or Defend. Any Perception checks they make are rolled with 3 dice.