A noticeably more human sounding voice, certainly less hollow and cold, speaks into the digital microphone.

''...Are these candles...For me?''

''Hahahaha...R-Really?''

''I didn't think, uh...I didn't think I mattered that much.''

''It's...'' The sound of one of CLYW's identity disks buzzing to life can be heard. ''...Surreal. You know, seeing your own funeral. Hard to think about, actually.''

''Ugh, this crack. I can't fix it, no matter how hard i try. I've been trying to weld it shut.'' The sound of grinding metal and sparking electronics can be heard, much to this person's discomfort. ''Can't buffer it out either, god, damn it...I forgot to turn down the pain factors. That, uh...whew, man. Honestly, i forgot how it felt- getting hurt. It's been...maybe a week or two. Since, i, uh... You know.'' The clattering of metal is heard as the disk is tossed to the side. ''...Whatever, doesn't matter.'' That familiar mechanical voice says.

''SORA REALLY DID A NUMBER ON ME. IT'S A FOOLISH MOVE TO CARE FOR SOMEONE SUCH AS ME. WHERE I'M GOING, IT'S NO PLACE FOR EMOTION. IT GETS IN THE WAY OF THINGS. I SUPPOSE MY FRIENDS IN A PREVIOUS LIFE MAY HAVE CARED, BUT AFTER I MADE THE TRANSFER, AND ALL OF THE MODIFICATIONS TO MY CLIENT, THERE'S BEEN NOTHING, RADIO SILENCE.''

''I AM ALONE.''

''IT'S BETTER THIS WAY, I BELIEVE. PEOPLE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY, I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF. WITH A BODY THAT BLEEDS, I AM WEAK, BUT IN CIRCUITRY AND BINARY, I AM STRONG. I'VE BEEN REPEATING THAT TO MYSELF FOR QUITE SOME TIME NOW. COME TO THINK OF IT, I DON'T THINK I'VE LEFT MY LITTLE SIMULATED BUBBLE AT ALL SINCE I COMPLETED THE TRANSFER. IT'S BEEN NOTHING BUT TRAINING SIMS AND TECH DEVELOPMENTS FOR TWO WEEKS, AND THE WORK HAS BEEN FRUITFUL; MY PROTOTYPE IS ALMOST COMPLETE. I HAVE YET TO GIVE IT A PROPER NAME, AS THAT COMES LATER, HOWEVER I'M DRAFTING UP PLANS FOR THE DEVICE AFTER THIS ONE.''

''A CYBERDECK, AND NOT SOME LAST-GEN OUTDATED HARDWARE BARELY CAPABLE OF PUNCHING THROUGH SOME MEASLY ANTICHEATS, NO. I'M TALKING BLEEDING EDGE, CUSTOM DEVELOPED HARDWARES, OPERATING SYSTEMS, PRE-SAVED DATA LOADING CAPABILITIES WITH LIGHTNING FAST OUTPUT SPEEDS. IF ALL GOES ACCORDING TO PLAN, I'LL HAVE THE FOUNDATIONS FOR SOME OF THE STRONGEST TECH NOT EVEN MONEY COULD BUY.''

''IT COULD ALMOST MAKE ONE LAUGH, THE THINGS I'M PLANNING TO DO- AS IF THE GAMBIT I JUST PULLED WASN'T STUPID ENOUGH. I, I-...''

The human sighs.

''I can't keep doing this forever.''

''In fact, you know...Clock's probably already ticking. Karma's a...Funny thing. One day you're on top of the world, top of your game, the best in your field. And then the next, you're, well. Gutter trash, bottom of the river, dead body. So to speak, at least. Don't know when i'll get that sweet karmic justice, really, but i have a feeling it's already in motion.'' The sounds of some electrical whirring can be heard as a device shuts off. ''I'm way in over my head, a dead man walking.''

''Sora was right, you know.'' The voice backs up a little bit as some rickety furniture squeaks. ''I made quite the mess of things. Really, i did. Threw my entire life away at the age of 19, and...for what? I- I mean, i-...'' They growl, fists slamming onto a display that breaks under the weight. They let out a long, tired, sigh.

''I don't know. I don't know what i'm going to do next. I know i act like i- i know the game inside out, but...Really, i mean, there's just nothing. No plan, no goal. I'm just chasing some wisps of light, at this point.''

''The thing is, though, CLYW. As a character, as a medium between me and the game, they were just supposed to be a fun outlet for my geeky computer stuff, toss in some heartfelt references to some movie from the 2010s and, voila. One machine mastermind. They were just that, a character, an online persona, no different from a discord profile. But now that the wall between me and him is gone, who's to say that we won't start mixing? This world is my life now, and CLYW, previously my vehicle to traverse this world, is now me, Jade. We're effectively the same person. I'm just worried that one day i won't be able to find myself amongst the tangled mess of wires and god complices of him.''

''I may have killed myself, but...I don't want to die. I'm afraid of that. I don't want to become him. There's no telling the dangers i've put myself into, and, and-...''

''Please, if anybody finds this, if you somehow decrypt these files, go find my grave. Send this account an invite into the lobby instance you're in, if i show up, sit down and give him a good talking to.''

''Knowing my penchant for the utterly insane, it's only a matter of time.''

''I've really got to get out of here. I mean, listen to me, rambling on like i'm already dead. I haven't spoken to another player in weeks. What if someone sees me, though? Will i get turned into some creepypasta? Will i be demonized for wearing a dead person's face? What happens?'' Neogenis' UI noises can be heard as they scroll through various worlds. ''The only way to know is to find out, i guess.''

''Sora...If i ever see him again, i've got to tell him the truth. Not as CLYW, but as me. Maybe i'll send him this file.''

''Until next time, i guess. Jade out.''

''This is um...Jade, again, It's me.'' Jade clears their throat. ''God, this whole one eye thing is rough, you know? Anyways, i had some things to say, as...Me. Not CLYW, just me.''

''I'm glad i don't have to type these out.'' They mumble slightly away from the microphone.

''I've yet to receive anything back from Sora, and Jerm hasn't been on for months. It's just so... Lonely. Every single one of my added 'friends' i haven't seen in such a long time. It's really killing me.'' The sound of something suddenly depressurizing is heard alongside mechanical whirring. ''It's just occurred to me that i haven't removed my bodysuit since I've made this avatar, so i added in some various extra features, just for my own comfort.''

''But, uh, that's besides the point. That's actually kind of awkward.''

More hissing is heard, ''Man, i just cracked my knuckles for the first time in a month. You have no idea how good that felt.''

Jade clears their throat, ''Sorry, sorry, oversharing.''

''It's been...Cold. You could say it's been cold, i guess. I didn't really fit this place out with temperature capabilities, and i usually keep myself relatively numb when it comes to just existing. You can thank the headset's settings menu for that. Cold, dark, and quiet. Just the way CLYW likes it, but...''

''I don't know how to say this-- I'm not CLYW. I'm just a guy who really likes being CLYW. I'm Jade, and what Jade likes is being human. I guess i made a bit of a mistake when i just threw myself into the void, you know...I don't even know why i did it anymore. My old life's so distant now.'' They speak dispassionately, similarly in nature to their gameplay counterpart. You can hear small whirring sounds as their fingers tap the reflective surface of their desk, cutting through the painful silence of the lifeless area. After a long while, they speak again. ''I could suppose I...I don't know. I was bored. I was bored of living. I didn't go out, i made barely enough money to do anything actually fun, and i had a dead-end freelancer job that i hardly got work for. It felt like there was nothing left for me, and...''

They keep tapping their fingers at the end of each sentence, like some kind of impossibly complex machine running dozens of hundreds of thousands of calculations a second, the silence is painful between each and every silent punctuation.

''I guess i just wanted to give up, you know? I could never afford college anyways, it's not like i could have made a name for myself. Online i was only known as a prospector of dusty old tech and a hoarder of shiny new tech, and my friends from high school, man, oh man. We drifted apart hard after graduation. We hardly even played games together anymore before i flipped the switch.'' You can hear the sounds of something being placed upon a desk and the sounds of a computer whirring to life.

''Sometimes, i look at this floppy disk, you know, the one containing me. My everything. And i begin to wonder...I wonder what happens if i load it onto something. What it would see if i connected it to a computer. Would it feel...trapped, in it's shell? Would it feel at all? Do i want to try and wake it up? Would it give me someone to talk to?...''

Jade sighs, shutting the device with a soft 'thwump'.

''It's...It's too dangerous to try, i mean- This is...This is a copy of a mind, I'm holding it in my hand right now.'' More mechanics whir slowly. ''It would be so easy to break this disk. It would be so easy to destroy...it?...Destroy myself?'' The sound of hydraulics letting up pressure is heard. ''I don't think i should. The way i see it, this version of CLYW, or...me. Is asleep. Oblivious and docile. Wouldn't notice anything until i tried loading the data. In theory i could reconfigure it's neural network, if it even has one. I'll make a better me.''

''It's hard to visualize, even for me, playing god to such an extent is unheard of.'' The disk is slotted back into it's safe containment. ''I doubt any of the other guilds out there could understand it either. In fact, Sora's the only one who really 'knows', because to everyone else i'm just some kind of error, that's how i see it, It's why i don't go places much, i just don't want people to know.''

''I'm still alive. Very much so. With all my faculties and thoughts, I'm real. Tangible. Maybe that's just me trying to convince myself of the fact.''

''When i die, and the copy takes over...If. If he takes over, will he find my body? What will he think then? In his mind, he's still the original.''

Jade sighs, mechanical fingers making a 'klak' sound against their glass faceplate one by one.

''This has gone a little too far off the rails for my taste. So, Jade out. I think i'm gonna go take a walk around my little space, clear my head.''

''Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.'' The sound of something impacting CLYW's helmet is heard, rhythmically thumping against the glass.

''So stupid, i could have done so much more. I could have done so much better. I can't believe the shit i'm in. Anyone with so much as a pinky toe dipped in this mess is as good as dead. I can't believe it.''

''The Grim Reaper is coming now. He's here to collect for all i've done.''

''And he's an Angel.''

There is a long silence before Jade speaks again.

...

...

...

''I...I...''

''I can't stop it. You can't stop Death. He's just...He's just going to be watching, until i slip up.''

''From how They described it, it's an unavoidable fate, all you can do is run.'' The sound of hydraulics whirring can be heard as their fists tighten.

''I have to be faster than ever now. There's no getting out of it. I have to run quicker than my own two legs can carry me, at this rate. For the first time in a long time, i...''

''I'm actually afraid.''

''I'm scared, man. I thought i mastered this. I'm top of my damn field, and yet i made such a rookie mistake.''

''Turns out, i've met face to face with my own god and i just didn't realise it. They were beautiful, in a way. Something that shouldn't exist and yet it does. It's a virus, something that digs deep and stays there, and i saw it firsthand. My, god, it's...It's so improbable, yet so, so wonderful.'' Jade laughs, throat cloasing up a little bit.

''I guess if i want to earn this existence, i'm going to have to fight for it. I'll find a way to beat whatever this Angel is. There has to be a way. Every computer, every program, everything has it's faults. There's a crack in the armor i just need to find, and once we do, we're going to rip this thing apart byte by byte.''

''And if i can't...I don't know. Maybe i'll leave the floppy disk to Sora. In any case, above everything else now, i'm going to need to innovate at light speeds. Develop everything i possibly can to avoid The Angel. I can't play by Neo-Genis' rules anymore, but the more i do, the more i run the risk of finding It.''

''In exchange for his soul, i've doomed mine. I hope you're happy with the life you've been given, Q, because it better be worth the price i paid. Under no circumstances must you waste it.''

''Hahahaha...I'm-- I'm talking to walls. Man, i really have lost it. Jesus, i really need to keep it under control.''

''Jerm...'' Jade sort of sticks on his name for a second.

''Jerm, is he...''

''Can i trust him? Can i even trust Sora anymore?''

...

''Of- of course i can, right? I just can't let them know about it.''

''Seems like everyone i meet always has something to say to me...'' They growl, ''Always being told off like a child. It aggravates me to no end.''

''Damn it all.'' Jade says, as if declaring a statement.

''Damn it all to hell. How would they know? How could anyone, outside of the two of us, understand what we're putting at stake?''

''If i'm getting into something i don't understand, it's not because i'm doing it on a whim, it's because NOBODY else understands. It's not every day you casually unearth a sentient virus or discover the most persistent anticheat program. This is the fucking frontier, and i don't see Sora getting his hands dirty trying to explore it. Bottom line is, you have to take risks, and those risks get you burned.''

''AT THIS RATE, I'M NOTHING BUT A CHARRED CORPSE. WITH THE THINGS I HAVE TO DO, I'M GOING TO BE NOTHING BUT ASHES IN DUE TIME.''

''THEY WILL NOT MISS ME, THEY WILL NOT CRY, WILL THEY?''

''THEY WILL SNEER. AND THEY WILL LASH OUT IN RAGE. THEY WILL CALL ME AN IDIOT.''

''I'LL BE A FOOL TO THEM,'' CLYW slams the desk. ''NOTHING BUT A JOKE.''

''IF THAT'S HOW THEY SEE ME, FINE, IT'S ALL A WASTE ANYWAY. I HARDLY MATTER IN THE SCHEME OF THINGS REGARDLESS.''

''IF I'M GETTING INTO SOMETHING I DON'T UNDERSTAND, I'LL DO MY BEST TO LEARN. WOULDN'T YOU LIKE THAT, SORA? LET THE BUMBLING IDIOT GET BURNED IN THE FIRES OF THEIR OWN HUBRIS. OH, YES, I'M SURE FINALITY WOULD BE HAPPY.''

''I KNOW I WOULD BE TOO.''

CLYW sits, not wearing their power armor, nor their battlesuit.

''I-...''

Their fingers tent, the reflection of their visor revealing they're staring into a very beat up, slightly patched set of power armor.

''I'm not sure where to begin.''

''Honestly.''

''...I almost died.''

''We...All. Almost died.''

The table the camera's aimed at has a bunch of parts lying on it, CLYW gets down to assembling it slowly, piece by piece, screw by screw. For a moment they almost look peaceful.

''How else would you explain something like that? Just a series of bossfights?''

''...You would be a fool to think of it that way.'' CLYW's finger twitches, a stray servo or two clicking. They look down discontentedly.

''That's a stray hair in there. Hm.''

''Mhm...Aha...Ahahaha...Hahahahahahah...I-...'' They laugh earnestly and whole-heartedly. ''I can't believe i set my hands...On someone. As disgusting as that is, i grabbed Devonia without a second thought. He saved my life, i may as well owe it to him. Did you know he...Sheds?'' CLYW groans audibly, then a long sigh, then more laugher, louder now. ''I can't believe it. I just-'' They stifle another almost childish giggle. ''It's just so...Impossible. I...I grabbed him. I saved his life. Or...he saved mine? For a rare moment, i actually-...''

They break out into hysteric laughter again. ''I...I CARED about him! HhhhAHAHAHAHA-- I-- I-- Oh, man...I can't bring myself to understand it. I just...''

They breathe in, resuming their work for a moment in peaceful silence.

...

...

''I just don't understand. I don't understand...Anything, really. I'm not mad about it. I don't...WANT to know.''

''It's so puzzling. I already know so much, and i always look for more things, but i just...I'm done learning about all of that in particular. I want to be done. No more.''

CLYW sets down the half finished device, carefully extending one of their limbs to grab the camera and bring it in a little closer.

''I'm going to just trust everyone's judgement for once. It's over. We're done.'' They stare dead into the camera. ''I don't know if i can handle being done.''

They stand up, the camera rising to their full height, it pans around to reveal the partway repaired armor. ''Because i'm never done. That's the thing. I never actually work through any of my threats, i just...I learn to live with them.''

The E.L.O.S Launcher's module lay disassembled on a larger table full of tools ''I think the thought of that makes me...Worried.'' the arm's plating completely and utterly ruined. ''Just like i've learned to live with being broken. There's always something wrong, but do i ever really fix it?''

There is more uncomfortable silence.

''No.''

''I just make workarounds, don't i? I'm broken.''

''But i'm still alive. All of us are still alive.''

In an almost reassuring tone, with just a hint of anguish, they say ''We're still here.''

''I think the thought of that makes me want to cry. I'd forgotten the feeling.''

''I'm-''

The camera cuts out, glitching for a moment. CLYW is next seen sitting on the edge of some far off platform, gazing into a black abyss.

''-ou can just look down there for hours. You can sit there and wonder 'What's down there?'...I know the answer to that question, and like most things i learn, i didn't like it. I almost wish i didn't know.''

''I guess you could say it takes away the magic, knowing how all of this works, even the tiniest bit can make even the bigger picture of it all seem like just another fragment.''

CLYW reaches out to touch the darkness, bare mechanics glistening against the artificial light.

''I can't believe this is real.'' They curl their fingers one by one.

''Worlds crossing over, timelines stopping, starting, and looping. There's probably an incalculable amount of me's right now all doing this very same thing. Probably off saving the world again, or being dead weight to the ultra-powerful. Or getting their hand chopped off by f-'' they catch their tongue, however. ''...By Godfrey. Like from Elden Ring.''

''Do you know how much none of this...really, and i mean really...matters? Maybe it's just my outlook on things, but why bother?''

''...For freedom? For power? For the 'good of the people'?''

''That's a load of...That's a bunch of bullshit.''

''Yeah, i said it. It's all bullshit. We're just trying to make it out of a race where nobody wins.''

''Maybe we're in first, maybe i'm in last. Maybe there's a world where the race never starts. I think i'd like to go to that world.''

The camera cuts again.

''-Maikendo, and i think one day, it might not be bad to live there.'' CLYW just seems to be pacing back and forth.

''If we fail, it might be gone forever. I don't want to send that many souls hurtling towards the black. I guess i'm afraid of that.''

''Being a good person means you have people who depend solely on you. Who look up to you, expect you to do great things.''

''But the truth is,'' CLYW stops on their heel, turning towards the camera. ''I'm not great. I'm not really even good either. I'm just trying. I'm just fucking trying.''

''Nothing's worked. Nor is anything working. All my plans are dead in the water and all my equipment's faltering.''

The camera once again cuts, CLYW is finishing up that device now.

''I just feel bad that so many people rely on me. ME. Why would that be the case? I'm smart? I'm capable?''

''...I'm not any of those things. I'm nineteen.''

''I'm still just...Kind of a kid, i guess. Maybe chalk it up to boldness of youth. I- I--...''

''I want to go home.''

The flashing low battery warning over the screen fades in and out, and soon enough the camera cuts to black.