Can't help but feel like I'm being watched nowadays, I keep getting these odd little premonitions that something horrible is about the happen. There's this little voice in the back of my head that's just screaming at me, begging me to do something, anything. "You're wasting your life away", "You could be helping people", "You could be drinking", "You could be doing anything more interesting than being you". 

Tried talking to my buddy Mark about all this, told me that I should just go see a shrink. What's that gonna get me? Pills? Thrown into a looney bin? I'm a god damn detective, I need to stay sharp and be dependable, I don't need some therapist telling me how to live my life. I did good last month, I saved as many folks as I could, I tried my best to resist the whims of those assholes I got sent along with, I don't get why I don't feel good about any of that.

I'd like to think I've done good work over the years, helped people, solved what the cops can't. Admittedly, a lot of my work has been spying on cheating partners, watching would-be whistleblowers, and looking at the occasional odd insurance claim. Never felt good about that sort of stuff, always felt like I was wasting my talents. I got into this line of work to make a difference, to try to clean up the streets, ensure repeat offenders couldn't anymore, that type of stuff. Maybe thats why that little voice keeps chirping up, maybe I am wasting my time. I should be out there making a real difference, getting rid of the bad guys instead of wasting away in this office.