So the boss wasn't pleased, and the truth about what I was doing came out pretty quick. He at least suspects something supernatural, and isn't buying the "cousin in a coma" thing one bit. It's just as well; I'm a pretty bad liar. I've lost a couple shifts because of this stunt falling right on the annual re-assignment, but that's alright. It gives me time to experiment with some more supernatural stuff, even if I failed. I just hope I can get full financial reimbursement on the next one, success or failure.

     Anyway, it turns out that not all Australians can just throw boomerangs with the accuracy I can. That's neat. I can try to expand on that, but short of becoming an Australian Ninja, I'm not sure what the proficiency with this kind of tool can get me. Though I do like the idea of being a ninja.

     Honestly, this whole plan to summon a girlfriend seems creepier the more I think about it. It was an idle daydream, but as soon as I realized it was possible, problems started showing their heads. I kinda want to see where this "ninja" line of thinking takes me. Also, I'll likely be encountering all sorts of potential supernatural partners if I keep this kind of work up. I don't think I want to "summon a girlfriend" anymore, though.

     I hope this means I've grown as a person, and I'm starting to develop a healthy respect for the supernatural.

     Though, now I plan to use supernatural powers to become a ninja, so I doubt I made this decision out of maturity.

     Once we finished that last contract, I realized that the pickle jar I got in Nevada had been instrumental in every success (or near-success) I'd had so far. So I asked our benefactor if they could make it better, and boy did they deliver. I don't even care if it's useful on my next contract, I'm still happy I've got it. Everything inside is weightless, and it shrinks to the size of a mason jar whenever I want. They made it the size of an oil drum, and I can carry around my entire pack inside the thing. It's already been a week, and I'm still thinking of new ways to use this new power.

     Since I was only gone for a long weekend, the boss wasn't even upset with me. I told him that "my cousin was back in a coma", and I think he understood. He didn't ask any more questions, anyway. I get the feeling he's waiting for my two-weeks notice now that he suspects of my new carrier, but the contracts don't provide a steady stream of income yet, so I'm not going to present one anytime soon. Other than that, work has been good and even without my old shifts I'm staying afloat thanks to the bonus from that last contract. Life is pretty good.

     As for that Australian Ninja thing, I had a couple ideas. I've been practising with my boomerang, and I'm alright at bouncing it off the walls and having it return to me, but the fact that I can't see around corners makes the ricochet aspect of the training kinda moot. Maybe for my next gift, I'll see about finding a way around this.

     Who knows how far this'll go before I go crazy?

If you were ever wondering what it looks like when a locksmith is fired... why would you wonder that?

If you're curious now that I've mentioned the concept, then read on. My two week's notice came exactly two weeks before I got out of the hospital. As I had hoped, my parting gift was coverage for the ridiculous medical bill from our patriotic friends across the world. It's just as well, I guess. I was just making the boss upset thanks to my absence, and I didn't really deserve my position anymore. It still kinda hurts, though.

The job hunt began and ended during a weekend of suits and sighs. My welfare can probably cover me until the next contract, and this time I'm keeping any neat shit they give as supplies. Nothing dangerous, obviously, but something that'll cover my expenses. Most of which will probably be in the form of instant noodles.

I might as well take this free time to philosophize on how I've saved multiple towns and I'm still portioning out welfare. It makes you wonder who's worth more in the modern world; the unknown saviour, or the grocery store clerk. 'Cause they both seem to be compensated accordingly.

Maybe I should contract out my skill in more ways than one, now that I think about it. Certain people need a ninja four times a year, but somebody needs a locksmith every day. And if I'm always there when they need either, I bet I'll be rewarded for it in both worlds. And one of those rewards might allow for me to eat some vegetables soon.

Alright, I guess it's decided! From now on, I'll be Klaus M. Locke, freelance locksmith 9-5, and ultimate ninja on holidays. That honestly has a nice ring to it, even now.

I still can barely believe it. After the first couple of experiences, that last job was practically a weekend jaunt. I hopped on a plane home after a nice night at the inn in town, courtesy of Mr. Ford, and was back home so fast I thought coffee would still be warm on the counter. I still had a full Sunday off, and I had big plans too.

Right before I left, I received a package from a customer, and it came with a request not just to unlock the contents but to fix the mechanism too. This was the perfect opportunity to show off my skills and try to earn a little extra cash on the side, so I asked back and forth with this guy whether I could film myself doing the job and post it online. I got the green light and I was ready to give YouTube a try.

I'll admit, I got a little excited. I put on all my tactical contract gear before going live, which might not have been the smartest move, but not a lot of people were watching anyway. I did a rundown of what I was fixing; an antique quartz clock that had a lockbox mechanism linked to the time of day, and was shut into a wooden statue of a crane, too. Pretty tricky stuff, especially if you work blindfolded! I'm pretty proud of this gimmick; I tie a blindfold in front of my magic sunglasses, then turn them on so I can see through not just the cloth, but the clock itself.

The three people that were watching were suitably impressed with my skill, but it was honestly child's play to me. I plan to continue with this channel in the future. I just hope everybody thinks I'm superhuman, not supernatural.