After my deck of tarot cards got soaked, I decided I needed to preserve them as much as I could with how dangerous these contracts are. I did my best to dry them out and preserve them before going on a trip to a specialty card shop I read about online that I suspected of having some mystic prowess about it like those liveleak videos online. As I entered the shop my excitement came to a crashing halt, it just looked like one of those cheap tourist shops to attract customers with nothing but some novelty to it, not a shop of the mystic arts. I looked around the shop but everything was a knockoff or made of cheap materials, even my waterlogged set of tarot cards looked better than this. However just as I was about to leave, a deck of metal tarot cards hidden in a back corner covered in layers of dust caught my eye. I don't know what it was but I felt called to the deck, and I even managed to haggle it down to $20 thanks to the fact they were covered in a layer of dust and grime. Once I headed home I discovered that my hunch was right and this tarot deck had mystical capabilities and a rather sharp edge, sharper than most knives I've ever seen. I decided to test them out even more and I seemed to teleport to where I threw the cards which shocked me and sadly punched a hole into the wall of my house which I had to get fixed.

I spent a quite a few weeks in urgent care, somehow not sustaining any lasting injuries. I'll have to thank Orlando next time I see him for helping cover the medical costs for me, but now all I can think about is how I can become stronger. I'm constantly replaying the scene in my head of being trampled on by that unicorn, and no matter what I can think of I just come back to the same conclusion: I am not flexible enough. So once I got home I started to train my body to its limits in a vain attempt to become capable of training my dexterity to new almost superhuman heights, but I'm just a man so I don't know what I was expecting. In a fit of rage I started to drink, ignoring the calls and texts from my sister who was concerned about my hospital visit in California. I don't know when it occurred but at one point from all the frustration building up combined with the alcohol I drank but did something stupid and did a tarot reading for a random squirrel. I didn't expect anything to occur but I felt it was funny and a much needed reprieve from all this practice, up until the squirrel started speaking.