Things have just been slowly getting worse again.  They're forgetting.  They're starting to take things away from me, and.. I don't know.  Everyone is starting to get on edge.  Kel is afraid, and I wish I could hug her.  My hackles are raised, and things are wrong.  Everyone knows it.  People are talking.  Even the guards are a bit stressed, I can tell.  They get more violent when they're stressed. 

I.. I think it's happening to the scientists too, I don't know what to think of it. I'm scared.

I stole a weapon from one of the labs and I'm keeping it close just in case I need to protect myself.  What else can I do?  It's not like I can escape.  And even if I did they'd just use my collar to kill me... and even if they didn't, there's just endless forest around.   There's nowhere to go.

There's something happening there's gunshots and screaming downstairs. 

I think I'm still alive.  I'm.. not entirely sure.

Maybe this is all a hallucination still.  First it was the dreams. Then it was the visions. Now it's everything. I no longer have any idea what is real, and what is not. I think it will pass.  In one way or another.  The diagrams were right.  I think.  But everything is... I don't know.  My thoughts aren't stable.  They'll stabilize, or I'll die.  I know that implicitly. 

Mel comes into my room sometimes.  He brings me soup, and a cold rag.  I think.  Maybe I'm imagining that too. 

[The pages are stained with drops of sweat.]

I shouldn't be writing.  I should try to be sleeping.  But I'm worried if I just sleep I'll slip away entirely.  I'm struggling to not.  I'll make it though.

[The next page has a much more steady paw.  It has only a few words on it.]

I made it though to the other side.