I dream of you tonight.

There you are, basking in the golden glow. You've always flocked to all that glitters and glows - it's your second nature. Your passion is bright and I can't help but draw near as well.

There is a look of childlike longing as your hand hits a glass wall. It's a world you've never been able to touch, dangling just beyond your fingertips. You reach upwards nonetheless, as valiant steeds catch your gifted eye. It's cruel, how you're made to see everything and yet you're still held back from the little bit of comfort you'll ever scrounge. Would you forgive me if I tried to help?

The ticket lies before you now. Some twisted part of me hopes that if I have what you want, what you need, then I will in proxy become the one you want. Your gaze stares past me. Of course it does - how could I ever blame you? A tragic tale it is, that if I ever spoke up, I'd be deemed spoilt and selfish. All I wanted was that little bit of happiness they promised on TV. I'd never expect you to solve my problems or fix me - I just want you to be here. 

Talk to me.

Look at me.

Know me.

You don't have to understand. You don't have to feel the same.

Just let me help you be happy. Just this once, I beg of you.

Your smile is all I could ever hope for - I know you still have it within you.

You're sat upon the horse now, kitsch turned miraculous. Your crimson hair is a complement, but really, I just like the sight of you. A knight in shining armour, like that seat was meant for you. Faux gold reflects within your eyes and I can only imagine what I'd look like in them too. The gold is for my hair, the gold is for I like you

Look, no hands, is what I think I hear. You spread your arms wide like wings to the sky, you've always been meant to fly. So fly, why don't you, as deathly screeching halts the tale. Porcelain shatters beneath you and suddenly you've fallen. Down, down, far into the abyss, and all I could do is watch in abject horror. Gears gnash and creak and crush, and my heartbeat falters at the sound of squelching flesh and shattered bones. Did it hurt? Did you know? How long did it last? Have you died by my hand? Would this have happened had I not given you that ticket? Or did you choose not to fly, just so you could be that much farther away from me?

...I get it. I understand. I wouldn't be friends with me either.

I just... wish you didn't find the need to die to prove a point.

All I can do is thrash and scream, knowing in worlds beyond that these words couldn't feasibly reach you:

"ZEPHYREN. PLEASE. COME BACK."

I wake up. There is darkness.

...I'm cold.

They called me.

Jimbo, was it? Chuck? Goro?

Doesn't matter, they can raise and shed a name with the snap of a finger. They play dumb about the 'jobs' but it's more of an unsaid truth by now. No one seeking magical artifacts could possibly be a regular person, and that includes them.

There was another guy too, didn't catch their name. Just seems to be along for the ride. I can respect that.

They wanted to meet at my place, but I know better. I'm still concerned that Goro has given me this much seemingly without an expectation for returns. 

There's so much to know, so much to learn, too much to do, time is slipping my grasp and I can hardly think straight. Am I straight? Ha... shouldn't have pulled that all-nighter looking into...

Him.

Jacob Cruz. 

Let's start from the top. Order of operations:

1. Goro called me. Said they wanted to eat gyros together and give me something.
2. Went to Oliver Crescent. Taxi.
3. Introductions. They looked like Linus Tech Tips. Said they were Linus Touch Tips.
4. Ate food. It was pretty good. Don't get the fries, apparently.
5. They had wanted to see Jacob Cruz instead, but the guy wasn't picking up. Dead? Unlikely.
6. Chatted for a bit. Goro knew Zeph. Shocker.
7. Gave me an address. Jacob Cruz's residence: Arbutus Residences South Tower, 4288 Yew St, Vancouver, BC V6L 0C4
8. Gathered some things.
9. Retrieved a thing. The Knobbler spoke to me. Kept chanting about misery and strength and having nothing to lose and goals and achievement. Kept changing their own narrative each time I called them out. Suspicious, but could be useful. I'll see where that takes me. Doesn't change the fact that I'll leave soon enough.
10. Went home.

That should've calmed me down. It didn't. Didn't know I could make this face. Shame from looking in the mirror doesn't even dispel it. It's not my place to tell myself I'm wrong for feeling this way. This guy took advantage of Zephyren. How old is he? Like, 30? Zeph was 19 up until a month or two ago. Wallowing in self-pity when all the things he's done are by his own hand - he has no one to blame but himself. 

I have his papers.

Nothing's stopping me from exposing him the moment I find him. Now, to decide whether he gets to live...

But Zeph... I... I don't know. I don't think I want to know? God, I just... What am I supposed to do here, with all this information and leverage and power and-

I never wanted this. I just wanted to know what happened and how I could possibly save him if he were in trouble. Jacob is the missing link here, I'm sure of it. He knows. I'll decide what to do with him after I've gotten what I needed.

GIVE HIM BACK.