Thistle's Questionnaire

I live in a tiny studio apartment in Cityville. The apartment is small but filled with plants and creatures. There’s a small balcony that affords some light and is covered in layers of plants. Inside are more plants on every surface, small amphibians, lizards, and isopods. Books on plants and animals and the occult cover most of the rest of the apartment. The clothes and blankets scattered throughout the apartment are either light pink or black with little else. A small futon is in the corner of the main room next to a small bookshelf that is set aside as an altar. It appears to be focused on plants and nature rather than any specific god or goddess. 

Currently I earn my money working at a small florist shop a few blocks away during the day. I work with plants and breeding new splices for floral arrangements that become crazier and crazier. I work a second job breeding and selling isopods and amphibians online. I spend most of what little money I have that doesn’t go to rent or food on occult and species research. I get most of my plants and creatures by “foraging them” from big stores and fancy homes in the city. And a small portion of my money goes to my pastel goth aesthetic that I get almost entirely from thrift stores and secondhand stores. 

My ambition is to revive extinct species, especially ones that went extinct because of human involvement and destruction. I want to reverse the harm humans and capitalism have done to the species and planet by bringing them back and using them to return balance to the natural world. Humans have done too much damage and been at the top for too long without any repercussions. I will destroy anyone who profits from the destruction of the world and its species and refuses to change. I will allow them to make a choice but if they will not change and accept natures will I will kill them if I must. I would die and kill to see natures will, her species that we destroyed, and the balance of nature returned. 

I was 12 when I realized the human world didn’t care about anything but itself, profit, and money. I saw my large interconnected forest home with my family and the animals and plants who shared it all slaughtered and burned. All because someone wanted to use the land for fancy fucking apartments and tourist attractions in the middle of the once lush forest. It made me cynical and opened my eyes to the truth of the world around me. It made me paranoid about everyone’s true intentions and made it hard to trust anyone or take them at face value.

I suppose the person I am closest to is the owner of the flower shop I work at. They filled a semi parental role for me even though we aren’t close outside of work. My “work parent.” They saw how much I loved the plants and flowers and offered me a job on the spot. They gave me something to focus on and the ability to work with the only thing I really value. They go by Atlas and are about middle age from what I can tell. They’re gender fluid and their style leans very much flower child and flowy, even when they present as masculine. Their partner Stella is a free spirit and I don’t see them much. They live above the flower shop with their two cats, Daisy and Marigold. Atlas and Stella are the only people I am close to and Atlas much more so. We have dinner together sometimes but I don’t like to leave my apartment other than for work and plants.

My childhood stopped when when I was 12 and the tragedy occurred both of my parents were sweet, fun, loving plant and nature-based people who loved the land and I stayed with them. They taught me all I needed to know. I lived with them doing homeschooling and learning about nature and plants and how to survive. My childhood was happy. I didn’t have any siblings, but I had plants and animals and everyone else around me and I was a content odd child. I fit in among my parents and the plants. I’m certain I wouldn’t have fit into “normal society.” After everything was ripped away from me I became depressed and angry at the world for taking them away from me and from ending my childhood so soon my childhood was the first time I learned the lesson that the world is not kind. The world takes what it wants and it doesn’t care. It only cares about money, power, status and nothing else matters. 

I’ve been in love with places and the concept but never someone. People have hurt me and betrayed me too much to ever truly believe in love among people. I have been in love with forests and glades and meadows and mountains. Ive been in love with my lizards and snakes and pets but I know they will pass and they get very short lives so I don’t let myself get too attached. I’ve had lovers but they were there to satisfy an urge or make a time better. But they were all passing flings that weren’t serious or anything I would call love. 

The darkest of my fears is dying before I can accomplish anything with my life. I have just been surviving and trying to make my way through rather than actually being able to live or make a difference. I want to make the world better and revert some of the damage humans have caused. I am scared the damage we’ve done to the world has already tipped the balance too far. That there is no recovering or coming back from the chain reaction of death and destruction. I think part of what caused this is that I have been followed by death, corruption, and the destruction of nature since I was a child and I am desperate to fix what I have always seen destroyed with so little care. 
I am scared of the greed of man and what it will cause. The results of a few thousand people and their greed and wealth and self indulgence destroying the lives of billions of other creatures and plants and making the world uninhabitable for everyone but those who can afford to live with the disease and contamination they’ve caused. They don’t care who they hurt, kill, or ruin all in the pursuit of their own greed and shallow materialistic lifestyles.