Luna Aoki's Questionnaire

I.. don't know if I should really be telling a stranger where I live. 

But I guess you seem trustworthy?

Um.. well, I live in Tokyo!  We live on one of the upper floors of Maktisha Tower.  It's a really nice view.  It's downtown, and.. it's nice!  I go to a really nice school, and everything.  I don't know where else we'd live.   Like... in Yokohama?  I guess that would be similar. Or do you mean like.. out in the country?    I guess we could, but I think that's further away from stuff!

Or do you mean like.. overseas?  I don't know.  My parents have made sure I have English lessons, but... I like it here.

Welllllllll....

I have kind of a small allowanceeee... butttt...

Well, I can control computers just by.. you know, thinking at them really hard.  So.. I sort of increased the limit on my account.  I don't think my parents actually review the statements, and it's just on auto-pay, so.. there's that!  It's pretty cool.

Or do you mean how do my parents get money?  My father works for one of the Zaibatsu - sorry, we're not supposed to call them that anymore.   But yeah.  He makes a lot of money there.

What do I spend it on?

I dunno.  Candy?  Not much, honestly...

I want to prove that I'm the ultimate Techomancer in the world.  I want to leave this broken body behind, and.. become something better, something pure.   A machine that won't break down.  But I don't want to just be trapped in a box or anything.  No.  If- when- I become something more... I won't be trapped.  I'll be an entity that can't be contained.  Immortal and free and perfect and uncontainable.

How far will I go?  As far as my body will take me.  Honestly?  I wasn't expected to survive this long.  My mother said I was just really, really stubborn.  I don't know.  Maybe. 

I hope I won't have to kill anyone.

Probably no closer to death than I already am.

Uh... probably being born with complex neuromuscular issues.  That kinda changed me.

It's influenced a lot.  I'm.. kind of a really big shut-in because going out.. sucks in a lot of way.  There's a private school nearby for kids with health issues, and my parents do their best to take me to it to get me some social experience.  I like to spend most of my time on the computer, though.  A tutor comes in sometimes, but.. I dunno.  I guess they're okay.

It's weird.  My body is.. like, okay, sometimes.  And then it's not. Then everything sucks.  And I'm just kind of trapped in it.

Well... there's my parents!

Riku and Hana.  They're both really important to me.  They do a lot for me.  Dad works a lot at his company, mom's home a lot of the time, though.  She keeps the home and everything.  She does her best to help me out of my bubble.

There's my sister, Keiko.  She's annoying.  But she's.. I don't know.  She's a good big sister.  She doesn't have the same issues as me, and I think.. she might kind of resent me just a little. I take a lot more of my parents  time than she does now, and.. I don't mean to.  But she still is nice enough to me, even if I'm... not very social, sometimes.

There's SamanthaBlue.  She's my best friend from online that I'm really close with!  Closer than anyone else in person, at least.  I spent a lot of my time chatting with her and stuff. 

My childhood has been... a little hard, I guess.  The health issues are the root of it.

Other than that, it's been good!  I guess!  Objectively so, at least.

I have two parents that love me, I have a big sister who.. yeah, I think she loves me.    I have all the resources I could need.  Anyone could need, really.  It's just.. I don't know.  The health issues suck, and.. I'm sorta a recluse because of them.  My parents try to put me in a private school, and I go, and.. I don't know, I'm typically pretty uncomfortable there.  Mainly because it takes me out of home, I guess.  So my parents have a tutor come sometimes.  I do well with him.  And.. I don't know.  I understand social stuff in an objective sense, and.. if I can get over freezing up I can like... talk to people really well. 

It's just getting over the freezing up to make it to the point I can follow the conversation trees that's hard.

Uh... no, not really.

There's a boy at my private school who teases me some, but I don't think that's the same thing.  He's annoying anyways.

I love my parents!   And my big sister.  That counts, right?  I would do anything for them.   And I think they'd do anything for me. 

Except there's some things they wouldn't understand, and I have to do them myself.  Like... you know.   These jobs.

Magical powers are... certainly a thing.

Will I ever be in love?  I mean.. probably?  I know  the concept, and it'll probably happen eventually?  What do you want from me?

Uhh... shotguns!  They're really scary!  And one just went off in my home like.. two months ago, and that was the first time I've ever really seen a gun!  And that first time it shot at me!  And that was really scary!  It almost killed me! 

So yeah... that was really scary!  Other than that.. I don't know.  I'm afraid of a lot of things, as embarrassing as that sounds.  I'm scared of large crowds... or... honestly, to be honest, even just..strangers.  Like, I tend to freeze up a lot when I see a stranger.   And it's embarassing, but I can typically force myself to speak with them. But sometimes I can't, and... yeah.

I'm afraid of the dark, which.. really sucks.  I have a nightlight by my bed, and.. I mean, I need to get over some of this stuff (Someone shot at me with a shotgun!) but it's still really hard.  I don't know.  I just.. imagine everything bad that could be in the darkness.  I can't see anything in the darkness, which means.. there could be anything in the darkness, right?  And that's scary.   Even if I'm getting stronger.  And could zap something!  If it tried!

Or at least I try that.

Well.. maybe my computer!  Like, my entire life is on it.  All of my friends, all of my memories, everything I spend my time on is on it.  It's why I have a good backup system! But yeah, it's really important to me! 

It's weird saying that all my friends are on it.  I dunno.  I guess my sister is sort of a friend, even if she's an annoying dork sometimes.  And.. I.. sort of maybe am friends with some of the other students at the class?  But it's not like I spend any time with them out of classes, and that's... kinda part of what makes a friend, right?  If you only see someone during some event you have together, you're more of an acquaintance. 

Right?

Oh.  On topic.  Uhh.. otherwise, maybe the pulse gauntlet?  I mean, it's super cool, and it's not like I can just buy one.  It showed up after I got it on Neo-Genis.  It's irreplaceable. 

Uhh... classes?  Probably? I got a new teacher and I'm having trouble speaking to him.  He's intimidating!  He's like a really big bear, and he has these glasses, and when he looks down at you it's like he's considering eating you or something. 

Maybe that's uncharitable.  He seems really nice, and he's trying, I just.. whenever I try to speak my throat just clenches up.  I hate it.  That sometimes I just freeze up and stare.  I hate my seizures.  I hate that they don't know what's causing them, and they don't know if it's going to get better. I'm never going to get to just live a normal life.  I'll never get a driver's license, and... I mean, even if I go out and take transit, what happens when I just have a seizure on the train?  A big scene and I'm the center of attention and I hate it.

Well... I wake up to my alarm, I get up, I dress, I go have a shower, I review my homework, I go on the computer until breakfast.

Sometimes my sister comes to bug me.  Sometimes I go to bug my sister.  Rarely.

I don't know.  I have a feeling my mom pokes her to try to interact with me, so.. I don't know.  I get social interaction?   Like I'm some shy thing that needs enrichment. 

..

Maybe I do.  I... guess I don't get a ton of interaction with people outside of the computer, and.. I enjoy interacting with her. 

I don't do a ton else to 'get ready to face the world'.  I sort of have to do it.  Sometimes my body hurts worse than other times.  I do a bit of exercise, they say it might help with the seizures.  It hasn't yet, but.. I dunno. 

I wish.

Uhh... well, if I'm going to be honest, probably ask my mom for help.  Or maybe my sister.  Keiko would lord it over me for like, a week, but she'd help.  And she's good at that sort of stuff!  She'd help me pick out a dress, and do my fur, and... all those sorts of things.  She'd probably also try to coach me on how to speak to people at wherever I'm going.

Unless it was on the computer.  Then I guess I'd make sure my profile was a little cleaned up and stuff.  If it was on Neo-Genis.. I don't know.  Maybe a new avatar?  Probably something bigger.  And maybe less juvenile than 'huge barbarian'

If it was in real life though.. I don't know where I'd be going that I wanted to look my best for.  Maybe graduation?  What I'd wear depends on where I'm going, of course. But it'd probably take me all day to get ready.

Or longer.  Even if a good bit of that is getting over my insecurities. 

Um.. I don't know. 

Probably whatever my mom does.  She tried to throw birthday parties a few times and invite the other kids, but.. I never really liked that, I think she's not going to do it again.  I heard my sister asking about maybe inviting some of my friends from the internet, but my mom said 'they're probably all like 30 year old men, I'm not doing that'.  And.. I dunno.  I don't think they are!  But I don't ask.  They're just.. friends online.  I don't know what they're like in reality.

It might be nice just to do something quiet with my mom and sister.

Being born with all these health issues.  Does that count?

I wish I was normal.  In a lot of ways. That I didn't freeze up talking to people, that I was more like my classmates, that I didn't have these seizures.  But I don't know.  Can I regret something I had no say over?

Other than that.. I don't know.  Nik just told me that he has a limp even after getting out of the game, and... that's sorta scary.  Like, I thought it was just a game, that we'd been playing a video game, but what does that mean if we can get hurt inside of it?

I  regret not saving Nik from getting hurt, and.. I don't know.  Not helping the other two more?  Did something happen to them? 

I sorta want to message them, but.. I don't want to be a bother.

Also, one of them is a literal devil.

I mean... sort of?  Simon's kind of... I don't know.  He certainly seems like the type do to that. And.. I think he kind of has, really?

Like, he said he was giving us a down payment and gave us superpowers, so.. I think that's sort of just granting wishes, isn't it?  I don't think I inherently have superpowers, as much as I wish. 

Like, couldn't you imagine?  Just being a reality warper or something?  Able to just.. do whatever what you wanted?  Change your body?  I'd heal myself.

So no, it's obviously not just wishes, otherwise I'd be better.

Instead, it's probably whatever Simon thinks would entertain him the most.  I think we all kind of get abilities that are.. on theme?  And I guess he decided that the girl who went on computers all the time gets tech-themed powers.  Okay.

I mean, I don't mind, certainly.  But it's not like I picked.  I was a little typecast.

I don't know.

I've never thought that deeply about it.  My parents aren't really religious, and so.. I don't know.  I've been to church once or twice for mass?  It was okay?  There were a lot of people, and it made me a bit uncomfortable, but.. it wasn't like anyone focused on me.  So it was okay.  Sorta.

But.. I don't know.  I mean, magic and superpowers exist.  I have them.  But.... Simon  granted them, and he's just really powerful.  But is he a god?  Is god sort of a jerk?

I don't know, maybe that's unfair to Simon.  He has given me superpowers.  Although he does seem to keep poking fun at us. Both in person, and like.. on the jobs he gives us.  A lot of them are just elaborate set ups so he can pull some kind of joke on us.  Which I mean, is okay when you're getting superpowers, but apparently Nik got hurt and it persisted outside of it, so.. what happens if you die in there?

I don't want to find out.

I don't know if anything I've encountered really is.. in conflict with my worldview?  What exactly does that even mean?

I mean, I knew there was magic in the world.  You can see it all over Cryptoleak and such.   I mean, I certainly never thought I'd get magic powers!  But it's not like I found.. I don't even know what I'd find that could put everything I was thought was true.  That the Japanese government was secretly run by aliens?  My mom complains about them all the time, so I wouldn't really be surprised.

It is weird that a video game  can hurt you.  I don't know what to make of that. Does the headset actually have something in it to  do that?  Because.. it's not like it it does that by itself, right? That has to be added into it.

Or.. is it somehow psychosomatic?  I think that's the right word.