I killed a man today. We were practicing for a fight and my sword turned into a lightning bolt again and flew into my hand. Poor Jim never saw it coming. All the guys are scared of me and my magic sword now. David tried to run interferance but there's only so much you can do in that situation. It's gonna be damn hard to get anybody to fight me now, though I guess Ronaldo will want me as a bruiser even more now. A giant brawler is one thing, a giant brawler with a magic lightning sword as a whole other level. D made me take some time off to rest. After the ghost house I got all jumpy and paranoid, and I had some scrapes and bruises what with getting thrown against a wall a bunch. I'm all rested up now and ready to get the day. Only I can't get any work yet the usual way. I suppose I'll have to go by that compound the Nighthawk guys were telling me about. i've been practicing with my sword. I know some old timer guys who fought in the army back before guns were really used all 'round and they've been giving me some pointers. And I can do that thing where it comes to me like a lightning bolt whenever I want now, all it takes is a little effort. And it's crazy mondo sharp too, like it will go through armor like butter and then go through anything behind the armor like butter. I think it will so just fine.

So I don't have an arm anymore. That's been an adjustment. But I'm like wicked strong now I guess. And I grew a bunch. That's pretty cool. I can lift a bunch of people sat on a bench with my good hand. I don't really know what's happening anymore. It's been a weird time. I swung by the Night Hawks just to kind of check in and see what was going on. They're a little too high brow for me I think. I can't fight anymore because everyone is too afraidand nobody wants to hire a one armed man of my stature. Ronaldo seems like he can't decide if I'm better than ever or totally useless to him. As if I couldn't break the legs of every person he could ever send to me. That Maddex guy seemed really cool. Maybe I'll hang out in whatever world I end up on next. I don't know how well a one-armed giant would fit in on any of these other worlds but I can't imagine it's any worse than here. At least someplace else I start with a clean slate. Plus they have all that cool shit out there. Maybe I'll get one of those little cars that looks like half a car mixed with a horse. One drove past us on the way to the bird and it sounded really cool. I need a fucking drink or ten. I doubt it could help me any but it would sure as hell be a good start.

This is the first time I've lost a game. It feels weird. Not bad or anything, I know I did good on that contract. Just weird. Even though I lost I still feel like I learned something. I don't feel the same connection to my sword that I used to. It kind of feels like any sword would work now. I keep thinking I can see those damn bikes moving on the horizon in the desert. I'm almost sure it's just my imagination but you never know.

I've been stuck in this damned airport for 2 months and still have no ideas about what to do. It's too hot to go around in my bigass coat and I can't exactly go around with my arm without freaking people out. A handful of people saw it and took pictures in Scotland and apparently I became famous for a brief time in some circles. I can't go into populated areas without causing general alarm, I can't cross any borders without police or somebody grabbing me, and I sure as hell can't get on a boat or a plane anywhere. Well, maybe I could get a boat. I never really thought about it before. I would have to scrounge up enough money to book passage but I could stand to wear my coat until I can get in a private room. I don't know where the hell I would go, much less what the hell I would do after that. And then there's the problem that I don't speak the language around here. I don't know. I'll think it over.

I've been getting acclimated here at the Church. Jason's a weird ass guy but he's alright I guess. He's been teaching me a little bit about all this technology stuff and I actually kind of get it, which is weird as hell. He pays me to help out around the place. I run into town sometimes and I've been getting to know the people around. Most people don't seem to know what to make of me, being so big and only having the one arm. And then a robot will drive me into town and I lift heavy ass shit with one arm. I've been doing a lot of reading too, just figuring shit out about the world. It's all new to me and I just wanna figure shit out. Jason complains that I read actual books instead of using the tablet he gave me but I like that they're physical things I can turn the pages on and shit. Overall life is quieter here. I've been seeing a doctor about my fear of cars and shit and they've really been helping me. It was a pain in the ass having to run back and forth from town and Jason's house for the first few weeks. I had to pay them a lot of money to take me on without giving them any information. I'm doing a lot better about them though. I still jump when they make noises they normally don't but I can get in them normally now without totally freaking out.

There was a storm the other night. I had a feeling so I took off my shirt and went out into the rain. I stood there for a minute just being. After awhile I screamed at the sky and it shot down a bolt of lightning at me. I caught it and it became my hand again. Gods above it feels good to have two hands again.

I hung around New York awhile after we finished with the job. I asked around all the two bit watering holes I could find but mostly they either didn't want to talk or didn't know anything, but the last one pointed me in a direction. He sent me to a garage a few blocks away with some low-lifes hanging out around their motorcycles out front. The jumped up asswad who is apparently in charge fucked around, found out, then sent me on a test run. I went over a few blocks and found them in a coffee shop. The kids working the place got scared off when I stared down the guy's goons and he started backing off when his first bodyguard came at me. I backhanded him and broke his neck instantly I think, so the other three goons started shooting at me. It didn't feel great but it could have been worse. I ran out the front while my guy went out the back with his bodyguards chasing after me. He apparently slipped in a puddle or some shit so it wasn't hard catch him and grab him by the neck. I held him between me and his guys and told them to get the fuck out of there before worse happened to then. They had common sense but the boss tried to bring his gun on me, so I broke the shit out of his arm and he passed out. I grabbed his keys from his pocket then took his car back to the garage. The douche who runs the gang took him off to patch him back up before they lay into him and left me with his name, Bliz (what a stupid fucking name), and his number. He said he'd be in touch so now I'm just holed up around the city, laying low until they call with that job. Apparently it's gonna be on the other side of the fucking country to one of those desert provinces. I'm not looking forward to that with my arm, but at the very least I'll get an idea for the players between here and there.