March of Dimes Massacre!

Early reports suggest nearly 100 dead at the annual March of Dimes charity ball in uptown Manhattan. While reports are still coming in, it would seem that some sort of incendiary device was used, & there appear to be no survivors.

The President had this to say:

"America wholly denounces this monstrous act, a case of domestic terrorism on par with 9/11. As then, every resource we have will be brought down on these perpetrators - no stone shall remain unturned until they have been found & brought to justice."

Echoing this response, Homeland Security & FBI are conducting investigations, though there is no official comment at this time. Several radical-left terrorist groups have claimed responsibilty. The reaction from the public appears split on ideological lines, with most americans abhorring the bombing of a charity - however, West Coast "Antifa" strongholds are tacitly celerbrating the attack, as the majority of the victims were wealthy philanthropists.

Camera cuts away to a bearded Hipster wearing an "Eat the Rich" shirt who is being interviwed:

"So, these so-called "Charities" are just tax shelters for the 1% Elites; This was clearly a strike against the Wealthy class made by the rising proletariot happening all around the country - it's about time these people suffered from Late-Stage Capitalism like the rest of us have."

We will continue 24/7 coverage of this evolving situation.